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Writer's pictureJulia Mesrobian

Mrs. Klaus' Last Straw - Part III


End of December 2021

 

Tuesday 14th of December 2021


Dear Dr. X,


I have this big struggle within me. I wrote to you in my last letter how unfortunate modern Christmas seemed to me. And here I am blessing the accommodations the modern advances brought to the world and therefore to me. I am torn between longing for simpler and more connected times and rejoicing in the ease and effortlessness of today. Isn't that a paradox? Aren't I the hypocrite?


You see, yesterday, after spending hours on my trusty computer, putting in orders, checking my already made reports (designed by computer too) and doing a million little but important things a the touch of my mouse, I stretched away and took a deep breath. As I did so, I whispered: "How lucky I am for this computer. Thank the fate for modern times." I caught myself instantly, as if I had uttered a blasphemy or a swear word. I was truly shocked. You see, my last letter to you was still vivid in my mind, and I had been quite forlorn for what I think I called "the truer Christmas".


But, I have to admit, that the curse that is modern times, is also a blessing. So let me write it here in black and white, so I can get reminded that not everything is for the worse: THANK GOD FOR MODERN TIMES! You see, without our computer system, I would not be able to do my year long research of the toy market, I would not be able to make the lists so swiftly and send them to our factories computer, which in turn, bring them to screens scattered all throughout the assembly lines and workshops, for the elves and myself to study and complete. It also allows me to keep everything up to date: which lists have been completed, wrapped, and packed in the sack, which lists is in processing and which lists is to do next. It makes all our lives much easier!


Yes, granted, the better our technology gets, the bigger the population grows. But can you imagine what mess we would be in without it? Organising, scheduling, order making, order completing, packing, etc. All of that, I would have to do myself, manually, like I used to a long while ago. Nowadays, I dare say I would ne be able to keep up and would probably have yielded to using magic even more. As I mentioned before, I am set on not using magic in the making of the toys and wrapping, because I consider that it is the action of making them that what makes them magical. It would break my heart to have to completely rely on magic...


Talking about modern times, this following revelation might make you laugh: Social Media itself helps greatly in my research... Especially, the naughty list research. Honestly, you only have to read a few post from certain individuals, and you know their true hearts. I am sad to say that displaying your vanity and cruelty has become somewhat of a trend, and it definitely helps me sorting the bad people from the good. The good ones are usually less vocal on the various platforms. They're poets, lovers, dreamers. They simply utilize their technologies to share with everyone. I guess the internet is riddled with two sides, completely opposites. And yet it has a very fine line in between...


I think I do not have much to say for today, and it is for the better, as the days get longer and busier by the hour.


Yours truly,

Carol Klaus.



 

Friday 17th of December 2021


Dear Dr. X,


That's it! This is my last straw. I cannot continue so. It is decided.


I think I desperately need a vacation. I am so tired and more and more irritated... Did you know I have never had a vacation? I want to go to the beach! I want to wander the streets of the beautiful cities I have only ever heard of. I want to go on an adventure!


I have never had the time. I push myself and my elves, each year a bit more. They are absolutely fantastic. Very detail oriented in their craft, always a smile on their faces, and kind words on their lips. I do not think I have mentioned it before, but did you know we spend most of the year, until it is high season, learning and re-polishing the whole planet's many languages? They are very good students, never defeated or frustrated with the slow processes. We dedicate one day a week to that endeavour, in that period of time between February and October. I insist on it each year, so we can fluently read and understand each letter, no matter of its origin.


But I digress. I was talking of taking a well-deserved, long-overdue vacation. Up until now, I have not allowed myself to dream of it too much, instead bringing my reveries back to the tasks at hand. Now, I find myself daydreaming of just going. No word, no warning. Just going and telling my elves to take their own well-deserved and long-overdue vacations.


Since none of us get any appreciation (not that we do it for the credits, but to be largely over-looked is simply becoming unbearable), since we are forgotten, I should allow myself and my elves a proper Christmas Holiday this year. That's it! I will travel the world, undercover, of course!


You like Santa so much, see what you get when he's all you can count on. See what happens when I am not here to run the shop. See what happens when the 'Santa's little helpers', as you call them, are not here to design, carve, build, decorate and wrap your gifts.


Santa's sack will be empty this year. Until you remember that Carol Klaus is important too. Until you call the elves either by their names, which you probably never cared enough to find out, or by their proper titles instead of 'Santa's little helpers'. How belittling and unfair is that appellation! First of all, they rarely see Kris, who never sets foot in the factories. Instead, they have to work alongside myself, who keeps a very tight ship. They have to keep up with the schedule and put up with my sometimes anxious managing. And they are not simply 'helping'. They are the masterminds! They are the ones who work tirelessly to bring gifts and presents to each of you, and so, may I add, whether or not you have sent us a letter. But I am the one being offended for them, they never so much as think to complain, neither towards you, nor towards my grumpy self. What blessed souls! What great injustice they suffer by your hands!


In case you want to start righting this wrong, start by learning their names. Start with the higher ranking and also our Employees Of The Month and Employee Of The Year for 2021. We post about it regularly on our website www.north-pole-inc.org. But keep in mind, there are 400 of them in total. Here are only but a few:

Alabaster Snowball is the one who devised the program we use on our computers for the naughty and nice list. Bushy Evergreen is our head engineer in the toy and gadget factories. Pepper Minstix and Shinny Upatree are in charge of keeping our village and factories hidden and secret. They use a little bit of that magic I mentioned previously. Did you never wonder why nobody stumbled onto our village? Why Google Earth shows nothing but snowy wilderness, where we should be? Sugarplum Mary is my personal assistant, and she helps create treats and sweets to put in the sack. Wunorse Openslae designed Kris' sleigh, and he feeds, cleans and looks after the reindeers.
Our Employees Of The Month, from January to December are as follow: Gimbel Snowflake, Bingippy Noel, Clara Hope (also our Employee Of The Year 2021, as she saved her fellow workers from a factory fire that started in August - luckily noone was hurt, and there was minimal damage), Frostie Bell, Eve Snowflake, Rocky Starr, Tinselle Rivers, Sugartoe Mistleplum, Ruddy Fudge, Snickerdoodle Fox, Candy Fruitcake and Peppermint 'Minty' Stuffer. They have been awarded for their speed, creativity, accuracy, innovation, drive, imagination, bravery, professionalism and sense of duty.

Up to you to share those names with your peers, your people. Spread the word if you wish. I strongly advise that you do, as we won't be back until we hear our names as strongly as we hear Kris'. Consider our holiday a walkout protest, our taking a stand, our strike.


'Santa' will be the only one remaining. You get what you wish for.


He is not a bad bloke, my Kris, but he is completely oblivious as to what huge amount of work goes into making Christmas happen. He even said to me once that the toys were made by magic, just like the sack is and the reindeers are. I thought at the time that he was joking, but now I am quite sure he actually believes it. That is how oblivious he is to our hard work.


He spends his entire year as such: Eating ("I've got to keep my shape, dear."), sleeping ("I've got to be rested for the big night, dear. I have to make sure I look jolly, with red cheeks and shiny eyes. I cannot appear sickly or tired.") and rehearsing in front of the mirror. He will spend hours repeating in different tones what he calls his 'lines' which mainly consist of the fan favourites:

'Tis the season!", "Joy to the world!" and of course, the incessant "Ho-Ho-Ho!".

He will also play saxophone, sing many songs, invent new phrases. Oh, for sure, he is dedicated. But as I said before, his work is only a fraction of what it takes. And may I be so bold as to add, he would still have plenty of time to assist us in our workload. But he, himself, is not a 'helper' for us you assume the elves to be for him.


Do you know that he doesn't even have to drive the sleigh? The reindeers have trained all year with me to go where they need to go, as fast as possible and as geographically logical as possible. Come Christmas night, they know every single address they have to go to. That is a lot of addresses.

Rudolph, Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner and Blitzen.

Those are the strong and bright reindeers whose names you only remember a couple of. On the most important night of the year, they are the ones whose work should be praised. Along with the elves and myself.


That's it. I have written what I needed to write. It is off my chest, but not off my mind. Think about it, Dr. X, and do not reply if it is to placate or reason with me. I am not looking for a debate. I am looking for acknowledgment. It is not much, in comparison to our achievements. Spread the word, publish my letters - I do not much care for secrecy anymore. Our magic to hide the place is so strong that even with our exact address, which I have given, none of you will find us. We are worked to the ground and still forgotten. It is high time this changes.


Yours truly, (despite what you may think after this letter)

Carol Klaus.


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